In which I brag about my trip

My dad didn't bring shorts. I know; It's a relief to the entire Internet. And I had some questions about what my dad calls me - pronounced like "cookie" only with a Spanish accent. I can't describe it but it's probably the only thing he spells right. Bless him. English is his second language. 

After the husband announced that he couldn't go, another story for another time, my parents and I loaded up the rented SUV and drove off. 

Have you road-tripped with your parents as an adult? Or rather have you road-tripped with my parents? No? Let me tell you what you're missing:

1) My parents found the satellite station with Hispanic hip-hop. These are often used in their Zumba classes. Cut to my mom and dad dancing Zumba moves for about an hour.

2) My mom has to pee. Every. Fifteen. Minutes. 

3) My dad yells at my mom every fifteen minutes. 

4) A huge truck with a confederate flag flapping wildly drives by, my dad yells out THAT'S A GOOD OL' BOY - and waves madly. 

About 3 hours on repeat. 

When we find the Blue Ridge Parkway we see this:  

Blue Ridge Parkway - October = Amazing. 

And then some of this: 

The house I threaten to buy my parents.

 I wish I could say this bevy of nature and peacefulness rendered my mother speechless. It did not. "THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING PLACE I HAVE EVER SEEN!" "HONEY, LOOK AT THAT! AND AT THAT! IT' SO BEAUTIFUL."

And it is. Beautiful. And amazing. And peaceful. 


Of course, I chose not to yell these things out at every overlook point. But then I am only half-Cuban. 


We went for a hike the next day. My mom went on and on about her knees and her back and her ankles and OH MY GOD LOOK AT THAT TREE. 

I took this picture. I KNOW. Amazing right? 

Continue to be amazed by my mad photog skills. Or is it skillz? 

Right? She may have yelled enough to scare away the rich white people from Missouri but I can't blame her. 

 At one point she shouted "And you say there isn't a GOD!" 


"Um, no Mom. I have never said that. Ever."


"Well PEOPLE do. And they have never seen this because THIS, THIS. IS. A. MIRACLE."


Wait til I tell you about the camouflage.  

My parents are adorable. And hilarious.